Conscious Partings

Don’t Be a Loser

By Lynne A. Santiago, PhD, LMHC


We have all heard about at least one “nasty divorce”.  It could be happening to a family member or a friend.  Maybe, right now, as read this  it is happening to you.  Our Twitter and Facebook feeds are cluttered with stories about nasty Hollywood divorces.  Courtroom battles that seem to go on forever, as each ‘ex’ and their outrageously expensive lawyers try to ‘win’.  Win what, really?  A bank account, a house, monthly alimony payouts that the average person could live on for 6 months?  And, of course, we can not forget the children—who are sadly caught in the middle.

 You don’t have to be wealthy or famous. Nasty break-ups happen to anyone.  

There are no winners—only losers.  

What is lost?  The answer is simple.   A valuable piece of one’s life line, just wasted away.  Life that no amount of money can buy back.  What is gained? Months, and more likely years, in a state of tension, uncertainty, anger and FEAR.  

We have to wonder why any one would choose such a thing.  

It doesn’t have to be that way.  Conscious Partings are based on principles that can help you avoid a nasty break-up, helping you to move through the relationship-ending process more quickly, with less fear, anger and grief.  

The Principles of Conscious Partings is based on the beliefs that:

• Individuals and couples who are in the relationship-ending process can end their relationship peacefully, from a place of respect and even love.

• Ending a relationship does not have to be hostile, intentionally hurtful, destructive or emotionally damaging.

• There is a difference between “being in love” and “having love for”, and that it is possible to end an intimate relationship even if you still ‘have love for’ your ex- partner regardless of being the one left or the one doing the leaving.

• You can maintain and improve  emotional, mental and spiritual wellness as you move through the relationship-ending process by working to increase awareness of your  fears,  anger, beliefs, assumptions, needs and the potentially hurtful actions that can occur.

• When there are children involved, It is important to have a ‘child-centered’ approach, making it possible to keep what is best for the children the top priority.

• The relationship-ending process is an opportunity to learn important lessons that will enrich your life, develop personal empowerment, heal old wounds and prepare your for a healthier relationship in the future.

All of this is possible if you follow the Conscious Partings steps either as a couple together or as an individual.  And doing so will keep your INTEGRITY intact.  

Begin to practice a Conscious Parting

Follow this blog for more about Conscious Partings.  These blog posts include Lessons Learned—real stories about how others like you have moved through the relationship-ending process in a way that brought healing and growth.  These blogs contain exercises you can do that will help you part with consciousness, helping you to keep your integrity intact while you go from “we” to “me”. 

Need more guidance?

I offer Conscious Partings Coaching Programs for individuals and couples in either of my two Tampa Florida counseling offices.  And if you live outside of Tampa, Florida or in another State, you can still participate in the coaching programs through my online  video conferencing platform.  What is great about this is that you and your ex can participate together without having to be in the same room..

Get a life time discount

Refer a friend and you will receive a life-time discount of 15%  on your coaching if, in the future, you find yourself faced with the end of an intimate relationship.  

You can talk to me personally by calling 877-540-3632
Or email me at lynne@lynnesantiagolmhc.com

I look forward to working with you.

Dr. Lynne